Wednesday, February 17, 2010

My Valentine's Day Analysis


If you're reading this thinking you're getting a glimpse of my love life (or at moment, there lack of), you've mistaken. This is purely about the ensemble romantic comedy 'Valentine's Day', a film I've been looking forward to since it got greenlit last spring after the moderate success of the disgustingly horrific 'He's Just Not That Into You' that stars half of Hollywood. So let's get right to it:

MVP (Most Valuable Player): Ashton Kutcher, I thought I'd never say it but he practically glued the film together. It's honestly the first time ever I was charmed by the Punk'd master.

LVP (Least Valuable Player): Kathy Bates, even I could tell she had one free day last spring and decided to be in this movie and shoot all her scenes that day.

Most Surprising Player: Emma Roberts, I've never seen 'Aquamarine' or 'Nancy Drew', but this girl has got all her aunt's charisma and more.

Most Disappointing Player: Queen Latifah, doing her best Miranda Priestley only proves Meryl Streep does it better.

Favorite "Love Story": I'm a sucker for kids, but young Bryce Robinson's search for his bouquet of flowers for his valentine has got to be sweetest thing ever.

Least Favorite "Love Story": Anne Hathaway as a phone sex operator trying to win over Topher Grace. I've never been embarrassed for the Princess before until she did her best Russian dominatrix accent.

Most Potential "Love Story": Eric Dane wants a family and all he got is a giant condo and an even bigger heartache, enter the love of his life at the end of V-Day. McSteamy finally knocks off that "holier than thou" attitude.

Blown Potential "Love Story": On paper, it should work but Taylors Launter and Swift had practically no chemistry as lovestruck teenagers- no wonder their real life romance ended just as fast.

So yes, in case you were wondering, I did enjoy the movie. It's no way the best thing ever but it served its purpose- inducing heartwarming fuzzies that make me go "Awwwww."


Walter L. Hollmann said...

Aw, I LOVED her majesty, the Queen. I liked the Hathaway storyline. Loved Eric Dane's storyline, but not a fan of his acting. Totally agree on the Taylors and LVP, though. And yeah, I was SHOCKED that I liked Ashton as much as I did.

Peter Chan said...

The thing about the Anne Hathaway storyline was that it reminded me too much of a lesser version of the "porn stand-in couple" from Love, Actually... except it wasn't as funny.

Walter L. Hollmann said...

See, I liked to think of it as "Short Cuts" before Chris Penn and Jennifer Jason Leigh got married. But I understand your point. Me, I thought it was funny.