My Double Feature Review

After not going to the movie theater in almost three months, I made a back-to-back (well, back-to-back weekend) effort to see a couple of summer blockbusters. And that's when I realized I don't miss going to the movies at all.

Shrek Forever After

The enticing part of watching this four-quel was not the content, but the fact that all I had to pay was $4.75 for a matinee at the Tallahassee AMC when I was in town for a wedding last weekend. Instead of completely soaked into the ogre-oriented fairytale like I was with the first two installments of the film, I found myself sitting there.. judging the catastrophe that has become this once creative franchise. The jokes were dull and elementary and the "what-if?" plot felt like a bad episode of the 90s sitcom "Dinosaurs". I suppose it didn't help that the sound system keep blowing out in the theater. Perhaps Walter over at Silver Screening Room is onto something, that AMC does suck hard at maintaining its facility. At least I got a voucher for a free admission to any AMC in the nation. $4.75 matinee in Tallahassee to $20 IMAX 3D in Lincoln Center.... not so bad for my troubles.

I was ready for Sex and the City 2 to suck. Everyone and every review has hammered this thing to the point of embarrassment. That doesn't stop me however to choose it as my first midnight screening of a film in close to two years. If I had known it was going to be 2 hours and 30 minutes long, I might have reconsidered, but watching four middle-aged women having fun dressed in ridiculously over the top costume would certainly be entertaining.

The biggest problem was the sequel is that it had no plot. 2 hours and 30 minutes of random occurrences by the four ladies. Starting with a gay wedding featuring an all-male choir and Liza Minnelli and ending with stock footage of an old black and white movie, it was the perfect example of what a "connect-the-dots" script looks like- while not boring, just nothing really happens besides the signature puns and innuendoes this franchise does so well. Perhaps my friend who went with me said it best- "There was so much eye-rolling from contrived over-the-top shenanigans, I didn't think to bother checking my watch."

The most amusing thing of the night was the four or five guys sitting next to us who looked like they were scouting for dates at the female-dominant crowd.