Monday, April 5, 2010

My Liveblog of Julianne Moore's Return

Julianne Moore's episode of 'As The World Turns' aired today so here's my little play-by-play of the episode of the cancelled soap.

:00 “Are we getting married or not?” Wow, some dramatic start. Even I know they’re going to get back together by the end of this episode. They’re not a market for ladies over 50 on soaps.


:02 OMG, it’s Matt Durning from the original 90210! I actually wanted him to end up with Kelly Taylor on that show. Anyway, back to this soap.. where’s Julianne Moore?

:04 Whoa. There’s someone under the age of 30 on this show and of course he’s the rebel who doesn’t believe in marriage since he was jaded by some chick name Alison. So, the name of the couple in jeopardy is Bob and Kim. 25 years, that must be an eternity on soaps.

:13 Flashbacks! What exactly did Bob do to deserve such a cold shoulder from Kim?


:14 Whoa. This stuttering, old lady is hitting on Bob! Skank, go away! So… where’s Julianne Moore!?!

:23 There seems to be a lot of infidelity in this town. This Bob guy sure has gotten around. This black and white decades old clip is a nice touch for what I can only assume is a tribute episode.


:28 We must be halfway through with the show, there’s a montage of characters from the show- most of which look like they fell out of an Abercrombie catalogue and are not on today’s episode.

:30 The jaded young one (Casey) wants his grandpa to tell his grandma she’s hot. The not so young one is telling Bob to “woo” Kim instead.

:31 More clips! This time with tweed jackets!

:34 Awww… Bob is “woo-ing” her with the help of some cliché soap opera writing and a resignation letter. Kim is starting to sound like Meredith Grey with her self-pity whining.

:37 There’s still 20 minutes left to the episode and Bob & Kim are back together. So what now? And more importantly, where the hell is Julianne Moore!?!!?

:42 What is the deal with all these ladies trying to get a piece of Bob? Oh, it’s just some master plan to make sure Bob wants to marry Kim.

:45 Awww, everyone has a happy ending on today’s episode. For a second there, I thought the back of Alison’s head was Julianne Moore’s. So… 15 minutes left, where is she?


:46 It’s a soap opera wedding! That means someone is going to die right?

:50 More cliché and pun-ny writing! Without Bob & Kim, the “world would be spinning off its axis.”

:51 It’s Julianne Moore! Hugging Bob! Yay!


:52 Followed by two very horny people in a bathroom.

:53 Hmm… that was a quickie. Someone’s busted. I must say these two intrigue me.

:54 Bob & Kim are Julianne Moore’s parents! More cliché and pun-ny dialogue with the words ‘World Turns’ in it.


:55 The preview for tomorrow shows nobody from today’s episode. Well, it was cool Julianne returned to the show, even if it’s all for 4 minutes. Hmm.. I hear Parker Posey and Meg Ryan used to be on this show too. Any chance of getting them on?

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